Jummah Mubarak

I’m in the perfect mood to celebrate the Sabbath day alhamdulillah. I’m sitting at my desk giggling and entirely not in the mood for walk. You have days when you are bogged down and days when you just can’t be bothered. You have days when you put your nose to the grindstone, meet the resistance head on and just get it done and you have day like today. The sun is hiding behind clouds, my fingers are cold, and its quiet in here except for the tapping of fingers at keyboards – but I feel lyrical and silly and upbeat. There are days when you hate what you are doing, when you have just had enough, when you long to find something you love and do work that nourishes your soul. There are days like today when I feel peaceful with what I do and feel like I am on the brink of discovery.

Then I got to thinking, if Allah (SWT) gives me old age, when I look back what would I like to see? Me and the better half sitting with our numerous grandchildren at our feet and out children at our shoulders. Love and laughter, gratefulness and ibadah (worship) and kindness. Feeding them home-cooked food, passing on my mothers stories, teaching them my faith and learning from them. Playing with them, annoying the heck out of them, giving my silk shawls and colourful jewellery to the little ones to play with. I know why Allah (SWT) put me here. To worship him and to spread his word as a da’ee, but I wonder what the medium for this should be. I know I want to help my sisters and to serve my community. I am trying to be patient, because I know my beloved Rabb (SWT) will make this clear to me.

So now I need to escape, all I want to do right now is walk and daydream and discover (and get a bit warmer and a bit less hungrier).