My better half came home the night before Eid (Chand raat) after
six weeks of doing dawah work in California.
As always there was relief and tears on my part and the sweetness of
coming home to your loved ones on his.
But always as always there were the small recriminations tucked away in
my heart. Of being left to deal with it
all by myself, of unruly boys and little ones and in-laws to look after. Of the barbed comments from people about his
leaving that I have had to endure so many times. Of feeling like my life is on
hold every time he goes away. Of feeling
stronger every time, but resenting having to be so strong.
He
dropped off his bags, we broke fast together and then took me shopping at 1am
despite my protestations that I have something to wear for Eid. As it was chand raat the shops were all open
and there was a really celebratory vibe everywhere. I found something I really liked and then he
insiste we find a scarf to match it.
We
had a beautiful Eid alhamdulilah and as always when he returns, he has been at
his kindest and most understanding, waiting for the complaints to subside and
helping me as much as he can. Knowing I
am tired, he gently reminds me that he could not do what he does, if we did not
do what we do, and what he does is so important to us.
On
my part I have to remember the importance of his dawah work, the value of it in
the sight of Allah (SWT) and the benefits.
He tells me the people he met in California were soft hearted and
listened to him, many were concerned for the iman (faith) and upbringing of
their children and were thinking about how they could ensure faith remained a
part of their lives.
In
any case, I am glad to have him home and I am thinking about how I can reward myself
with a break of some kind, if not physical, then mental at least.
Chocs from America, I look forward to taste testing these :)
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